I'm revisiting my old podcast The Eyes Have It and determining that I'm not quite as much of an eye-color hardass as I was two years ago. However, I still think it's important to not use the over-mentioning of eye color as a crutch. Surely there's something more interesting about your character than the color of their eyes!

Here's an example from Spanish Fly Guy where eye color is important:

...it was a guy. A hot guy. Ryan swallowed and looked away, but he’d seen enough to get his mind racing. Young. Slim. Casually hip, like a socialite who’d been out clubbing and was on his way home the next morning. Dark hair, finger-combed back. Eyes—well, Ryan hadn’t looked long enough to see what color his eyes were. Intense. Lively. Smart. He’d seen that much.

The character Ryan has trouble meeting people's eyes when he talks, so he takes a quick glance at the love interest, JP, and no more. Then here, later on:

JP crouched in front of Ryan and nuzzled the bulge in his jeans. Ryan stammered, “You don’t have to…I’ll make you the copies.”

He was so accustomed to looking down that it didn’t occur to him that all JP needed to do to lock gazes was turn his head. Blue. His eyes were blue. Like the bay after a storm. “It’s not about the copies.”

So when are some appropriate times to mention eye color?

• When characters first meet, provided they're close enough to see or notice eyes
• As two characters are pulling out of a kiss
• Whenever lighting and proximity are right for eye color to matter

Your assignment

Read a story and take note of the first instance of eye color mentioned. Do you think it adds to the story or not?

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